Friday, April 18, 2008

Just Tase It

Yeah, I know there are lots of concerns about tasers these days. Being abused, misused, blah blah blah.

I think they should get their act together. What we really need is a Personal Home Taser. PHT. It could have a catchy advertisement campaign:

"Problem with the kids? Just tase it! Neighbours giving you guff? Just tase it! For all of your irritations in life.... Just tase it!"

Man, think of all the family situations that you could make better with a Personal Home Taser.

"Daaaad!!! He keeps kicking me!!"
"I am not!"
"Yes you are! You're doing it now!"
"Well you shouldn't have sat in my spot!"
"You got up!"
"I just had to go to the bathroom!"
"Yeah, well, you should have....."
BZZORRNKKK!! BZZORRRNNGKKKK!! Aaaah.

Or even:

"I'm not eating this! We had this last week! How come you never make anything good! Why can't you..."
BZZORRRRNNGGKKKK!

In fact, you could use the PHT in every room in the house:

"Honey, are you awake?"
"Oh, God. Don't even *think* about it. I've got such a splitting headache that I could..."
BBBBZZZZZOOOOORRRRRRNNNNGGGGKKKKK!!!!!!!!


Yeah, well, at least it would be cool if you could overlook all those pesky human rights issues.

Why are the neatest gadgets always imaginary?

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