Grooming Disasters Averted Worldwide

You know, I've had a beard for... um, a long time. And it's been cut down to a goatee since... um, around 2000 I think.

So I've had my share of grooming upsets. Occasionally I've trimmed something a little too close with the clippers, and had to run a little lopsided for a few days or weeks. In fact, back when I grew actual hair on the sides of my head, I even had a triangular chunk shaved off it (I knew there was a problem when my wife said, "Ooops!") which I had to walk around with for two weeks.

So my point is that grooming incidents can happen to even the most competent of us.

NOW, miracle technology has been developed so that even a total moron can grow a goatee.

Please consider, for your viewing pleasure, the Goatee Saver:



Isn't that charming?

I'll save you reading the manual: Hold it in your teeth and shave around it.

So now, if you know a total moron who can't normally walk and chew gum, who is nevertheless sporting a totally symmetrical goatee, you can smile and say to yourself, "Goatee Saver."